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Changes

We are in week 3 or 4 of Lucas not being in preschool anymore, and while the transition has gone well, there have been a few growing pains. As a parent, I want so badly to protect my children from ever feeling confused or insecure. Lucas is a creature of routine, thriving when the day is planned and feeling secure with set boundaries. Seriously, this kid loves to know the rules. If he would always follow them, well then my life would be even easier!

So when Matt and I decided to keep Lucas home full time (he was in preschool 5 mornings a week), I knew we were taking away a sense of security for Lucas, and that worried me. One of the reasons behind our decision were comments Lucas kept saying to me, "Mommy, I want to be home with you and Ava" or "Do I have to go to school today?. After the first week of being home full time, I started hearing comments like "when do I get to see my friends again?" and "what day is it? Is it a school day?" Thankfully we got through those moments pretty easily and they haven't come up again.

But now, I'm back to subbing at Lucas's preschool a couple days a week, which means that Lucas and Ava go to school with me. Yesterday, I was on the playground when Lucas's class came out to play. He saw me, gave me a big hug, than asked me to go away. He said he wanted to play with his friends without me there. My initial reaction was "oh, that kind of hurt", but I quickly realized that Lucas needs the separation of Mommy/family time and school/friends time. I'm hoping in the near future, that we can rejoin the gym and provide me some much needed exercise/alone time and give the kids a couple hours with friends and other authority figures.

We've stayed pretty busy with play dates and activities, running errands and visits from Grandma. The Lord has really blessed us with some great friends with kids who play well with mine. I've started Lucas on some workbooks to try and keep up with his learning, but I'm not much of a teacher. Apparently we are both going to learn a couple lessons in patience during this season.

I wish big decisions, especially ones about the kids, came with a guarantee of success. But that wouldn't be true to life, would it?

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