Last night, I was totally exhausted. It had been a long day and no matter how I sat or laid, I could not get comfortable. After an hour of tossing and turning on the couch, I told Matt that I was headed to our bedroom to watch the season opener of Top Chef . Every pillow went behind my back until somehow I found a okay position, for at least a few minutes. The show started and held my attention as I watched 16 people do things with food that I've never seen before. Several times throughout the hour, I swatted away a fly that kept getting near my head, never taking my eyes off of the t.v. With 20 minutes left in the show, I casually looked down and saw a huge, monstrous spricket sitting on my thigh. Screaming bloody murder, I ran through the house, ripping my pants off as fast as I could, finally collapsing into Matt's arms, a mass of tears and hysteria. When the words finally came out, my super-hero husband immediately went into our bedroom, flashlight in hand, and began lookin...